3000 miles away

I need to get back to You

This post is really geared toward the people who know me best, but also to anyone who knows me well enough to understand what I'm talking about.

Over the past month (or maybe more, I don't really know) I have been acting strangely toward people, and I have not really been acting my normal "happy, energizer-bunny style, zesty, excited about life and living and the small things", self.

I'm the kind of person that doesn't realize I'm doing something until someone brings it to my attention - and when it's brought into the foreground of my mind, I'm able to at least recognize I'm doing it, although I may not know or understand why. Once I'm able to recognize, I then move into trying to figure out why I'm doing, saying, or acting the things or ways that I am. I have come to one general conclusion for the moment.

I'm not happy.

I realize that the basis of my happiness is and has always been God. And the reason for my unhappiness is that I'm so far away from God right now, and I just feel like I'm struggling to hang on to where I am and trying to get back to Him.

To my friends: I know I have not been the friend to you that I normally am or should be, and I apologize. I don't have that many friends, so I cherish, treasure, and appreciate every one of you.

If you don't hear from me before then, I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and an exciting and fun (yet safe) New Year.

Parting Shot (ala Mike Tuttle):

"Your absence changes me and everything seems so wrong;
but with no sense of irony I write you this sweet love song;
Distance is my tutor - so well he's teaching me
in the education of appreciation - and I got my Ph.D.;
Take me home to that face - 3000 miles away."
- 3000 Miles Away by Daily Planet